How assertive are you?
Assertiveness and What is Assertiveness ? One definition of assertiveness is the need to stand up for one’s own rights and aspirations in today’s sometimes intimidating world. Assertiveness is a subject that is taught and improved by many general training programmes, particularly for people who come into contact with others in their profession, such as carers, as apart from providing self-esteem it is also a valuable communication skill.
The difference between aggression and assertiveness
When you act assertively you communicate better and command more respect. This can improve your working, social and personal relationships. Assertive behavior should not be confused with aggressive behavior.
Aggressive people display a lack of respect for the personal boundaries and opinions of others and are as a result liable to have a negative effect on others while trying to influence them. Assertive people communicate by not being afraid to speak their mind, nor are they afraid of trying to influence others, but they do so in a way that respects their right to an opinion.
Test your Assertiveness
How assertive are you? - Emotional Intelligence Online Tests
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It is necessary for all of us to possess basic assertiveness skills in order to see us through the day, in order to maintain our self-esteem and to provide a shield by which to protect ourselves. In the following test, answer each question or statement by choosing which one of the three alternative responses given is most applicable to you.
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Scoring:
Total score below 10 Excessively assertive
Total score 10–14 Very highly assertive
Total score 15–19 Very assertive
Total score 20–24 Above average
Total score 25–29 Average
Total score 30–34 Below average
Total score 35–39 Very low
Total score 40–50 Excessively lowsource: TEST YOUR EQ book …Assess your emotional intelligence with 22 personality questionnaires by Philip Carter Kogan Page (London and Philadelphia) : This book Translated to Persian by Mahmood Amirinia and Parisa Aghazadeh in Iran, ISBN: 978-600-5908-95-4
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Assessment your Assertiveness
Total score of Assertiveness 30–50:
Mr Micawber was Charles Dickens’ eternal optimist, always expecting that something would turn up. Your score indicates that you are a twenty-first-century Mr Micawber. This is an enviable outlook on life to possess. You have the ability to look on the bright side on almost all occasions and expect that in every dark cloud a silver lining will appear, and that out of every bad event something positive will emerge.
Providing you do not become naïve or complacent about life’s sometimes harsh realities, which could then provide you with a great shock and setback when they inevitably occur, you will remain largely cheerful and to a great extent carefree. By possessing this attitude you are, therefore, able to get the best out of life, providing you are prepared to accept the inevitable downs as well as the ups.
Total score of Assertiveness 21–29:
Life is to a great extent a roller coaster: it can be exciting and stimulating, there are high points and there are low points. Your score indicates that you are more of a realist than either a pessimist or an optimist. You are likely to remain hopeful that the high points in life exceed the low points, which they usually do, and unlike the pessimist you do not tend to exaggerate the low points in your own mind, to the exclusion of the high points.
Total score of Assertiveness 20 or below:
Although you might prefer to describe yourself as a realist, your score does suggest that you have a predominantly pessimistic outlook on life.
This may mean that you are perceived by others as a somewhat negative person. You may also frequently suffer from a degree of inner turmoil and loss of sleep.
This may be your own way of creating a defensive emotional shield against the consequences of what the future may have in store. Then if the worst happens you have prepared yourself for it, but if things turn out better than you anticipated you will feel good – until you start to prepare yourself for the next potential catastrophe.
In actual fact, a pessimistic attitude does not make anything better or worse in the end, and in some cases it can cause worry that can lead to stress-related illness and even make negative things happen that would not otherwise have occurred.
One strategy to counteract an overriding pessimistic attitude is not to make mountains out of molehills. Instead try to concentrate on the positive aspects of life and put negative thoughts to the back of your mind.
Unfortunately this is not so easy to achieve, especially if it is not in your nature to do this, but it is worth the effort as you will then start to feel the benefits both health-wise, and by an improved outlook on life in general. One lesson to be learned from the eternal optimist is that
pessimists, indeed people in general, always seem to worry too much. It is a fact worth bearing in mind that most of the things we worry about in life never happen anyway, so that in the majority of cases we are worrying unduly.
source: TEST YOUR EQ book …Assess your emotional intelligence with 22 personality questionnaires by Philip Carter Kogan Page (London and Philadelphia) : This book Translated to Persian by Mahmood Amirinia and Parisa Aghazadeh in Iran, ISBN: 978-600-5908-95-4, Link1 , link2 , Link3.
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